Navigating Job Loss, Career Grief, and Professional Resilience
“Amidst professional heartbreak, there lies a silver lining—an opportunity for growth, self-discovery, the refinement of values, and the crafting of a new professional identity. Grief, in essence, is an inside-out job.”
— Dr. Tatiana Astray
Why Career Grief Matters for Executives
Job loss, leadership transitions, or saying goodbye to a beloved role or team can feel like losing part of your identity. For many professionals — especially at the executive level — work is more than a paycheck. It provides structure, purpose, and belonging.
When those routines and roles are disrupted, grief inevitably follows. And it isn’t only emotional. Research links job loss to increased rates of depression, anxiety, and even physical health challenges.
For executives, career grief matters on two levels:
Personally — navigating your own transitions, whether through promotion, displacement, or a career pivot.
Organizationally — setting the tone for how teams process disruption and how cultures absorb change.
And here’s where the Trust Formula (Credibility × Character × Connection) becomes critical. Grief threatens all three dimensions if it’s not acknowledged:
Credibility breaks down when leaders go silent about layoffs or transitions, leaving people confused.
Character is questioned when decisions appear inconsistent or values are abandoned in moments of pressure.
Connection is eroded when leaders ignore the human side of change, creating distance instead of empathy.
Handled with care, however, grief can strengthen trust. Leaders who show up congruently across credibility, character, and connection model resilience and signal to their teams: we can move through this together.
My Own Story, Part I: From Academic Dreams to Letting Go
As a young girl, I dreamed of pursuing my PhD and becoming an academic. That goal defined my identity: I loved the rigor, the pursuit of truth, and the mystery of life revealed through research. It was a beautiful calling — one I believed would shape my life’s purpose.
And I achieved it. I became an academic, teaching, researching, and living in that world. But when I had my daughter, something shifted. Academia, while fulfilling intellectually, no longer fit the life I wanted. I craved more immediacy and impact. I wanted to translate knowledge into empowerment for leaders and professionals, because we don’t stop being human when we step into work.
Letting go of my academic identity was a form of grief. It meant mourning not just a career, but the younger self who had believed academia was the pinnacle. That identity had to shed for a new one to emerge.
What I learned in that season is that you cannot bypass grief in transition. If you don’t acknowledge it, your heart will keep longing for a past that no longer fits your evolution.
Understanding Career Grief
Grief isn’t limited to bereavement. It is a psychological response to any significant loss — including losing a role, a team, or a sense of professional purpose.
In the context of a career transition, grief can unfold over varied timelines: for some, it may last a few weeks; for others, it may linger for months or even years. Research suggests that 1 in 5 people experience a lower quality of life for several years after job loss.
That variability is precisely why executives must recognize grief both in themselves and in their teams, and intentionally create conditions where it can be processed constructively.
One of the most helpful conceptual tools is Stroebe & Schut’s Dual Process Model of Grief, which frames grief not as a linear journey but as a dynamic oscillation between two modes:
Loss-Oriented Coping — confronting and experiencing the emotional pain of what was lost
Restoration-Oriented Coping — adapting practically: building new routines, reimagining the future
This back-and-forth — oscillation — is not a flaw; it’s adaptive. Healthy grief involves periods of immersion in the pain and periods of stepping back to restore.
In fact, recent qualitative work validates this: people describe moments where grief “takes center stage,” alternating with times focused more on rebuilding and reengaging life.
A more alarming dimension is complicated grief following job loss. While most people eventually adapt, a minority develop prolonged, disabling grief reactions tied to depression and anxiety.
Unresolving career grief also has organizational consequences. McKinsey has flagged unresolved grief as a hidden leadership derailer, affecting possibly one-third of senior executives at any given time and costing companies billions in lost performance.
By framing career grief through the Dual Process Model and understanding its nuances, leaders gain three things:
Normalization — acknowledging grief is part of change, not a sign of weakness
Empathy for others — knowing team members will oscillate between loss and rebuilding
Strategic leverage — designing spaces for both reflection and restoration, so transitions become growth rather than decline
What Research Tells Us About Job Loss and Resilience
A 2021 study by Van Eersel, Taris, and Boelen explored how 525 workers experienced job-loss grief and found that reactions vary widely. They identified four groups:
Resilient (45%) – low levels of grief, depression, and anxiety
Grieving (25%) – strong grief reactions but limited depression or anxiety
Mixed (17%) – grief coupled with significant depressive symptoms
Depressed (13%) – high depression with some grief reactions
This research shows there is no single “path through grief.” People experience and process loss differently, which is why leaders need tailored strategies to support both themselves and their teams.
One way to begin is by asking: Where am I right now?
Do I feel largely stable, able to adapt, and ready to move forward (Resilient)?
Am I mostly sad or disoriented, but still functioning day to day (Grieving)?
Do I feel stuck between sadness and more persistent symptoms like lack of energy or motivation (Mixed)?
Or am I experiencing deep, ongoing distress that feels hard to shake (Depressed)?
Recognizing where you are is the first step toward choosing how to respond.
Adaptive coping strategies help move grief from barrier to catalyst:
Problem-Focused Coping – clarifying next steps, making concrete plans
Positive Reinterpretation – reframing disruption as a growth opportunity
Emotional Expression – journaling, sharing experiences, or creating space for dialogue
Seeking Support – leaning on mentors, coaches, or advisors
Reflection prompts: Am I making space to feel this loss? Am I also giving myself room to take small, constructive steps forward?
Non-adaptive strategies may feel easier in the short term but tend to prolong suffering:
Denial
Avoidance
Blame
Numbing behaviors (overwork, substance use, shutting down)
Reflection prompt: Am I trying to outrun my grief, or am I moving through it?
While non-adaptive strategies may provide temporary relief, they stall growth. Executives can play a pivotal role by modeling adaptive responses, embedding them into organizational culture, and ensuring that career transitions are handled with clarity, compassion, and humanity.
Building Resilience Through Career Change
Professional grief doesn’t have to be an endpoint. When navigated intentionally, it can become a powerful catalyst for growth, clarity, and renewed leadership capacity. Research on resilience shows that recovery is strongest when leaders engage in structured reflection, small experiments, and intentional support systems rather than relying solely on time to “heal.”
Here are four evidence-based practices to strengthen resilience during career transitions — and how each one reinforces the Trust Formula (Credibility × Character × Connection):
Reflect on your values → strengthens Character
Anchoring to personal values increases resilience and reduces stress during change. Leaders grounded in values project integrity, fairness, and consistency — the foundation of character.
Ask yourself:What do I want work to mean in the next phase of my career?
Which values am I no longer willing to compromise?
Redefine your identity → strengthens Credibility
Research on role transition shows that identity work is central to adaptation. Leaders who craft narratives that integrate past and future roles experience less distress and project reliability and clarity — reinforcing credibility.
Consider:Beyond titles, who am I as a leader?
How do I describe myself in ways that aren’t tied to one role or company?
Experiment with small steps → builds Credibility and Connection
Studies on post-traumatic growth suggest that taking incremental, low-risk actions builds momentum and confidence. These experiments demonstrate capability (credibility) while opening doors to new relationships (connection).
Try:Networking conversations in adjacent fields
Short-term projects, volunteering, or courses to test new directions
Prompt: What is one small experiment I can run this month to explore my future self?
Seek trusted guidance → strengthens Connection
Support from peers, coaches, or mentors significantly reduces the intensity of career-related stress. Leaders who seek and model support create relational trust and demonstrate that leadership is not a solo act.
Ask yourself:Who can I lean on for perspective and accountability?
What kind of support structure do I need to make decisions with confidence?
When approached this way, grief becomes more than something to endure. It becomes a teacher: clarifying values (Character), demonstrating clarity and reliability (Credibility), and deepening relational support (Connection). In other words, it becomes a pathway to stronger trust — both in yourself and in your leadership.
My Own Story, Part II: Honoring What Was, Embracing What’s Next
At first, I felt the pull of a past identity I had worked so hard to build. But over time, I realized something essential: I didn’t need to erase that part of myself. I needed to integrate it differently. The rigor, love of truth, and joy of discovery that defined my academic years didn’t vanish — they found new expression in the way I now serve leaders and organizations.
Academia became a season I deeply loved, one that enriched me but no longer served where I was headed. By letting go, I created space for a new identity aligned with the life I wanted to build and the impact I wanted to have.
The quote that helped me most was: “You cannot move forward with one hand in the past, because it will always pull you back.” For a time, I let myself feel that pull. Eventually, I committed to letting my heart be fully present with my new dreams.
Now, I see the past not as something I lost, but as something that lives in me and fuels the work I do today. That is the paradox of career grief: when we honor it, we carry forward the best of what was — without being held hostage by what no longer fits.
Final Thoughts: Growth on the Other Side of Loss
Career transitions can feel destabilizing, but they also invite you to reshape your professional identity and strengthen your inner resources.
As I shared earlier, career grief matters for executives on two levels: personally, as you navigate your own transitions; and organizationally, as you set the tone for how teams process disruption and how cultures absorb change.
Unresolved grief isn’t just personal — it becomes a hidden leadership derailer. In organizations, it shows up as quiet quitting, disengagement, stalled innovation, or leaders avoiding tough decisions. The early signals are often subtle: a drop in team energy, risk-aversion, or a reluctance to speak candidly. Left unaddressed, these patterns can erode both performance and trust.
Handled with care, grief is not a derailment from leadership — it is leadership. By acknowledging loss, practicing adaptive coping, and modeling resilience, executives can transform moments of disruption into opportunities for clarity, trust, and renewed capacity.
And here’s the directive: as leaders, you cannot outsource grief to HR or assume people will simply bounce back. How you show up in moments of loss — with clarity, fairness, and humanity — is the ultimate test of your leadership presence.
For me, leaving academia was a reminder that grief is an inside-out job. You cannot move forward with one hand in the past, because it will always pull you back. By honoring what has ended and allowing space to grieve, you create the conditions to step fully into what comes next.
👉 Take the Leadership Trust Audit to assess where you might be holding back — and how you can lead your next chapter with clarity, credibility, and connection.
